April, the 17th it mentioned; I had to scan my inbox looking for the ticket I held so dearly, I had earlier assumed it were deleted or not saved, but how on earth could I part with it? The first movie we caught up together. I have never been a movie buff, been too impatient and lazy to drag my bum to a theatre and remain glued to a seat for a couple of hours, but then it were She, with her a âNoâ couldnât have been the answer, also I had recommended her on watching the film when the trailer first came out. I distinctly remember sipping a black coffee at our favourite cafĂŠ, when the trailer was playing on the muted television set.
âYou, you have to watch this movieâ; I had said.
âWeâll go together, after Bihuâ; She replied
I, wasnât sure about her plan; She had made multiple plans earlier only to thwart them later. To concentrate on the coffee and the pastry was a better deal, let the time arrive; I thought in my mind.
She called me on the 16th to confirm if we were going for the movie, I said nothing, instead booked the tickets immediately, She cared for the money spent and wouldnât let it go in vain I knew; why give her a chance to drop her plan; with her mood swings one never knew what was to come; it often blew hot and cold at the same time.
The movie didnât interest me initially, all that I was looking forward to was meeting her; I had never in my life been so much into someone; I could make excuse after excuse to get to see her; that was all that mattered. A movie meant sitting beside her for a couple of hours at least, and who knew if a dinner would follow.
I was late, I was so much in a hurry to make it to the theatre on time that I forced the cabbie to violate a signal, the traffic cop pulled him aside, but you know how things work here. A bit of buttering and sweet talk and we could move ahead, to make it in the nick of time was a huge relief, She wasnât impressed though. She and her friend were waiting for a good 15 minutes, I didnât mind being rebuked if it were She. I still miss the moments when She would go berserk and start blabbering as if She didnât care a dime, but She did; venting out too often made her the person She was. It kept her grounded too.
The movie was slow, really slow; a classic it was. A tale of love and loss; a tragedy I hadnât seen for years. Love, loss and longing. The guy caring for his lady as if nothing else beyond her existed, as She lied on her death bed, I hadnât been moved by anything being shown on the big screen as such for a long, long time. And, tears started flowing. This is why I avoid watching movies with people, I tend to get extremely emotional if I connect with any of the characters, empathy maybe. She looked amused on seeing me cry, She laughed and joked, called me a kiddo, passed me tissues and pulled my cheeks. It felt cute, it felt good but nothing could disconnect me from the trauma the lead was going through. It pained, it hurt and I kept on choking as I held my tears. She wiped my glasses so that the screen didnât blur. I was sobbing all the while.
âIt is so difficult to handle youâ; She remarked, after the movie. Yes, it is; always has been; I knew. But then, She handled me rather well. No one else could calm my nerves as She would. And, as I write this piece, I take a long pause; breathe and take a look at the box which She gifted me; a box full of night jasmine flowers, now dry and turned brown. I wish, I could go back in time; sob and weep. Iâll keep the box safe, Iâll keep her within me.
Itâll be October soon, the Night jasmines will bloom again.
abhishek purkayastha 