To have felt, to have been crippled and to have sought intervention isn’t anything to be ashamed of. I have had my highs and lows, phases when I felt too stressed and disturbed, but then; sweeping things under the carpet had become more than just an idiom. The need to feel socially acceptable, presentable and not have my sanity questioned was a far greater deal than sulking and popping anti depressants to calm the surges of anxiety and soothing my nerves.
But, then I was blessed to have ‘friends’, who would go on to pretend to care and pull off their masks when behind. Who said he’s depressed? It’s fake, ain’t it? Yours is the real depression, his isn’t. Well, the assertion being raised by an engineer and not a psychologist here, questioning the diagnosis of a psychologist. What felt like a soothing embrace then, reeks of hypocrisy now.
Strange is the way chemicals fuse to elevate or suppress mechanisms of the mind that is way beyond our control and understanding, dopamine and serotonin, ever heard of them?? Well, my ‘friend’ in question hadn’t for sure, that’s equally depressing.
I have had my sanity questioned before, it’s not an entirely new experience, but to have been held in embrace and then made to choke and suffocate, that was a new high. The ordeals of the mind, the calamities of the reality that existed and the vanity of thoughts which keep on spiraling is to be countered and encountered.
Not everyone who is depressed feels the urge or necessity to see a counsellor, and the one who does, he knows for himself about the consequences he faces if he doesn’t, proving a point to prove the existence of sanity in someone else is out of question.
To anyone who feels depression can be faked hasn’t lived through it, perhaps the coping mechanisms in people vary. Some choose to vent out, some even change cities, and there are some who withdraw into a shell and become incommunicado. And, there are some who pop in pills to manage the show. It’s never about you versus me, who’s more depressed??
The magnitude or severity of it is better gauged by the person concerned and the one qualified to, fire fighting skills may make one a savior, examinations and trainings and being on the job and reading and gauging minds; perhaps make a psychologist.
Assertions and opinions are welcome, all served free, while footing bills for pills for the momentary secretion of chemicals involves courage to accept, to wake up and make that call. Depression it is, not the garbage on the road that you litter, no one would sweep it clean for you; no putting it under the carpet, time to dust !!
abhishek purkayastha 