The mind does wander, it wanders into the by-lanes which now seem distant, but who can hold it’s reins, not me certainly! The mind gallops into a territory where it can feel numb, vulnerable and delight itself at the same time. This affinity with pain and longing and the pleasure of holding on to whatever remains, although now in ruins: it does feel good. Someone had once rightly said: “There’s something beautiful about things in their ruins.” There’s no coat of superficiality over it, nothing to hide the flaws etched over the surface, there’s something really surreal. Perhaps, the mind is now grazing at a vast field looking over one such gigantic monument: something that could have been, but it is no less beautiful.
As, I now sit by the sea and watch the waves hit the shore; my mind wanders off to the distant land. It is seven seas across, thousands of miles away; yet the pull of it: it is as strong as it were when I had last visited the place. It were home to me, it is home to me; and each time I feel lost, I know there’s one such place, perhaps now within me; where I can seek refuge.
There is but a hint of delusion, but for now I shall let it be: the peace amidst the chaos, the serenity I experience each time my mind walks through the now barren lanes of my heart, it knows all misapprehensions would be taken care of, there would be rest and refuge for the weary soul.
The waves keep crashing as Beth Hart plays in the background..
“You know me better than the poison in my veins
So, remember when God forgets my name
For you and you alone I’ll lay my monsters down
And I’ll watch the sun come up over….”
P.S: Ending lines from the song – My California, by Beth Hart.
abhishek purkayastha 